The missing piece

I get why it may be difficult to be single. I get it. Every time a relationship ends for me, there is a yearning for some one to touch again. Not only physically, but mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Those parts of you can only be touched by someone you fully commit to and someone who fully commits to you as well.

The problem is, if you are unable to make that connection with yourself then you will not find a suitable partner that touches you in the right way. 

Sure, I’ve fallen in love with people whom may not have categorized into what makes my heart truly compatible with theirs. We will have meaningful conversations, great sex and go through lessons learned. 

It’s worth it. It really is. It’s just that these bonds fall through the cracks that aren’t filled, because there are aspects missing. 

There are parts that don’t quite connect. Two pieces of the same puzzle that just don’t go together. You try pushing those two edge pieces together that seem as if they’re the perfect fit, but they retract. 

I keep trying to put those two pieces together. With every relationship I attempt, I know in the past it hasn’t worked so why do I keep trying to push? Putting all my strength down on the two puzzle pieces in order to force them together.

Now it’s time I take a step back. This is what being single does for you. You get a glimpse of the puzzle entirely. Work on other pieces, form other parts, find other edges.

You’ve learned a lesson. Those two pieces just don’t go together, so you separate them as to not make the same mistake again.

I’m slowly starting to see the image of my own puzzled life. I’m starting to see which people belong, which paths I should take and conserving my energy on the parts that really matter.

One day I’ll find a match for that piece which symbolizes a romantic relationship. I’ll find a man that fits so well into my molded life, that I’ll press down with ease. 

It’s not finding a partner or being out of love that is the hard part. Being single is a struggle because you’ve been focusing all of your time on energy on these two pieces that just don’t fucking work and you suddenly notice you’ve gotten nowhere with the rest of the damn puzzle. It’s accepting that there are other parts in your life that need working on, developing on and struggling with that’s the hard part, because only then are you able to find that true love you are searching for. 

That missing piece.

Just realize you will not find it until you take a step back and look at the full image of what you’re creating your life to be, with all the other missing parts that you must put together first.

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